There is
much to be said about the preoccupation (and perhaps even infatuation) North
American culture has had with the concept of individualization. At birth, we
begin to be bombarded with limitless forms of communication regarding our
formation as an individual. Early on parents of a newborn child help to shape
who they understand themselves to be through the clothes they way, the
interaction they have, the food they eat and other environmental factors they
are exposed to.
As this
child continues to grow and develop, they begin to experiment with different
ways of expressing themselves while being taught to develop their individual
skill set through education, the arts, apprenticeships, fashion and work
experience, among other things. The focal point of the ascension of humanity in
the North American bubble is "to be all you can be." And while there
is intentional emphasis of individual development, there is shockingly less
focus on communal wholeness. Sure we may reference the fact that humans are to
develop a social conscience, and learn to manage conflict with others, but
there seems to be far less attention paid to the development of an entire
communal hub (family or some other connecting point) than there is on individual
achievement here in the first world.
I've had
the privilege of travelling to a number of different countries outside of North
America. What I find refreshing from my experience (other than cuisine), is the
communal perspective from which many of these international cultures create
rhythm. You may have heard the notion that "it takes a village to raise a
child." It's one thing to say something like this and another to see it
lived out in a contextual setting. With all the emphasis we North Americans
place on individual achievement, I wonder if we unintentionally sacrifice our
innate desire to connect with others? Have we defined connection to mean a
source of weakness instead of strength?
In no way
shape or form am I suggesting that individual people don't matter...quite the
contrary. Every individual does matter, and because they matter, they have
purpose. Part of this purpose is to connect with others in a communal hub. So
if the communal connection is just as important (if not more so in some
respects) than the individual connection, how does the way we approach a rhythm
for life need to change?
I'd like
to suggest three simple ideas that may inspire all of us to create a new sense
of rhythm.
1. Lone wolves always die. The concept of a communal hub can also be
witnessed within the realm of the animal kingdom. Most living creatures prefer
to exist in community (schools of fish, pack of wolves, herd of elephants,
etc.). Animals have learned that there is not only safety in numbers but also
great strength. A great white shark can fall victim to a pod of dolphins that
will mercilessly fend of their predator by bombarding it with a barrage of full
speed collisions with their rigid noses. The animals that exist in isolation
seem to have a decreased limit to their effectiveness and in many cases their
actual lifespan.
When a
lion is stalking a herd in search for fresh prey, they spend a significant
amount of time observing the community. The lion takes note of how a community
responds to a potential threat. As a strategic moment, the lion will race
towards the herd at full speed with the intention of creating and instilling
fear into its prey. If the herd stays together, it can fend off the attack. If,
however, an individual animal gets separated from the community at
large...well, let's just say it doesn't end well for them.
If we are
created for the purpose of connecting with others, than believing that we can
"go at life alone" is not only a lie, it's a death trap. Lone wolves
always die. Sure, you might win a battle or two, but in the end you will lose
your life, and you will die alone.
2. When it's all over. We all know that life on earth doesn't last
forever. I've had the honor and privilege to walk with many individuals and
families as they have walked through the inevitable reality of death. The
common thread in each of these individual stories continues to be how they did
or did not connect with those whom they loved. No matter how grand their life
had been; no matter what they did or acquired, at the end of their life itself,
they chose to celebrate their connections with people, not things.
The only
investment that pays true reward is that which we make in the lives of others.
Positive or negative, how we connect with people will be the only thing that
matters to us when our lives are over. Disagree with me? The next time you are
in a public space where multiple generations are present, watch how our elder
generations celebrate life. What are they making time for?
3. Connection is strength, not weakness. Imagine for a moment that
our world can be represented with individual Lego pieces. Now I happen to
really love Lego...it's a fascinating invention. These building blocks can
create some incredible masterpieces. But there is still a limit to Lego's
creativity. You are unable to create something with just one piece. You might
have a really great piece of Lego, but unless it's combined with other pieces
it will always be limited in what it can do.
This same
principal can be said of us as human beings. Unless we intentionally choose to
create connection with others, a communal hub of sorts, we will not be able to
achieve our potential in our original design for life. Community isn't an
option...it's a necessity. We cannot exist in isolation. Resist the pressure of
complete individualization and embrace the idea that connection creates
strength, not weakness.
No comments:
Post a Comment