Thursday, April 3, 2014
Two keys to working with people
This is one of many different trips that I've been a part of in the youth ministry world over the years. Each time I've travelled to a different country, experienced a different culture, or have simply taken the time to be present with a group of people I've noticed that there are two primary values (keys) that drive connection: a place to belong and someone who believes in you.
These values aren't limited to culture, context, age or gender. They simply exist because they speak to the core needs of humankind. So if these values happen to be the root motivators for connection, what does that mean for us as leaders who work with people? I'm not an expert in this material at all, but I would suggest there are some key shifts that may need to take place in the systems and communities we leaders create.
A place of belonging. There are numerous articles written by people who are much smarter than I am on this particular subject matter. Here is one of my favourites written by a friend of mine, Mr. Mark Oestricher.
The question that belonging answers is "where do I fit?" If the communities, activities and environments we help create answer this question for the people we hope to serve, then we are on to something. But, what if the reverse is actually true? What if the sub-culture we've created is based on something other than acceptance and love and polarises people rather than embraces them?
Can you believe different and still find connection with those around you? If we foster a place to belong we value and embody love ahead of anything else.
Someone who believes in you. Every single person who is in existence, has existed or will exist in the future needs someone who believes in them in their life. Someone who comes along and speaks hope and life into you at a dark place in life. Someone who has your best interest in mind in the way the speak to you and interact with you. Someone who isn't willing to see the dark side of our human nature overshadow the hopefulness of the image of God that exists in every human being.
Without someone who believes in us, we may never find the strength to persevere through tough times or the hope to carry on when things don't seem to make any sense. What if having someone that believes in us is a literal matter of life or death? No one can walk through life alone, nor should they believe the lie that says they have to. Do our ministry efforts foster a culture of belief and hopefulness through the exchange of respect, honour, love and admiration?
Do you agree with these two ideas? What would you add or subtract from this conversation?
How can we navigate through the uncertainty of conflict in relationships? Where do we start?
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